on THAT WALK HOME WHERE IT ALL MADE SENSE

A couple weekends ago (edit: uh, like, a month now? maybe?), I met up with a friend for an early dinner. I hadn't seen him in a couple of years, but we'd kept up through texts, and facebook, as you do. We've probably hung out less than ten times in the years we've known each other, but all of them have significantly affected me. On this day, our chat shook me out of a state I had unknowingly fallen into.

We were talking about how he'd ended up in his (first) dream career as a professional athlete, by somewhat stumbling into a field that most people train for their entire lives. And then how he'd gotten into the next (dream) career, this one taking a good amount of schooling and a move across the country, putting him on the very subway car that we met on. I listened to him talk so casually about these amazing things he's achieved, and his can-do attitude, before bursting out with laughter, asking how was it that we'd ever dated, since we were clearly so different. His classic smile appeared on his face, and without missing a beat, he reminded me that I'm just like him. That the very traits I admire within him, are also within me. That we're both 'those kind of people' who push limits and do things that normal people don't always take the risk of doing.

Oh. Right. I had forgotten.

We wrapped up dinner and as I started toward home, I decided to walk through Central Park. I didn't really know this side of the park and started to get nervous that I'd end up lost or turned around. But something louder told me to just keep going, putting one foot in front of the other. So I did. A cycle began; I'd be moving forward for awhile, then I'd start to get nervous, remind myself that I was safe and it was fine and to just keep going, and on and on.

I don't know about you, but this is how I move toward what I want in life. I'm on the path to it, but then I get scared, nervous, worried that I can't trust myself, thinking I should look to others, everything starts to blur.. and then, I remember. I am on the right path, exactly where I should be, heading toward the place I want to be. I am safe, I am loved, I am taken care of and I can listen to myself for guidance. The more I let my feet (actions) lead me, the less my fear (mind) can take over.

In return, I got these beautiful gifts from the world. Stunning views with light catching just so on the buildings, as the sun slowly made it's way to bed. A fountain that I'd never seen, but always wanted to. Gorgeous ceiling tiles and architecture to take in. And when I finally made it across and out of the park, the most beautiful sunset was waiting for me.

You are safe, you are loved, you are on your path, you are where you're meant to be. Keep putting one foot in front of the other.

On Words For Your Soul

I find that if I'm paying attention, the words I need come find me. Here are three sections of articles that have affected me lately. Let me know what's affecting you lately, yes? Yes. xo

"Want to inspire lasting change? Don’t tell somehow how you want them to change. Don’t nag them to do things a certain way. Instead, be the example and show them there’s a better way. Set a stage such that they get to experience what’s possible."

- From Amber Rae's latest How To Inspire Lasting Change - well worth reading the whole thing.

"I didn’t realize this until recently, but the most destructive thing smart people do is spend their lives waiting. Even people with lofty dreams and aspirations get distracted by the inertia of ordinary events and subconsciously store their goals in the waiting place."

- From Dustin Curtis' The Waiting Place - again, totally worth reading the whole thing. Then go seek out his post called The Fight.

"When you feel like life is wrapping its fingers around your spirit, clenching its fists around you energetically, placing its strong hands on top of your head in an attempt to say, "stop. growing." push back. It's a test. When you wonder if you're invisible, or perhaps no one will love you or see you, or that you may have to compromise your spirit because, "that's just life".... remember that the ground beneath you will always support you, that the heart that's beating inside of your chest is always your steady companion and that your life is YOURS, that you decide your shine, the only person who can switch on/off INNER LIGHT, is you. These are the ways you can love yourself. Light, on."

- From Chelsea Talks Smack's These Are The Ways You Can Love Yourself - for goodness sake please read this whole thing. I can't tell you the agonizing I did over choosing what section to quote here because all of it sits so dearly in my heart.

On imperfections