Oh hey internet. If it seems like I disappeared, that would be because I did. This whole running your own business thing.. was that my idea? Here's what I didn't factor in.. you ready? because this is a big time super amazing piece of advice: running a business centered around dogs and running a business centered around humans are very different.
More on this brilliance after an update on my life via instagram pics:
Tell me that's not some genius shit. No, but really, when I was running my own dog nannying business for the past 2.5 years, it was pretty easy. The dogs were perfect company, didn't mind if I had to take a phone call, were on a pretty solid routine, and were okay with sometimes not talking. People are very different. That being said, I'm pretty obsessed with coaching and am able to do it right alongside acting. Add in my other social media gig with, you know, life, and that should explain the disappearance. But today I realized that I really miss reading blogs and writing my blog so hopefully I'll be able to blog more frequently.
If you want to learn more about my coaching/consulting business, visit here.
The website is being redesigned soon so keep your eyes peeled for a re-launch!
If you're a blogger and want to be a part of a test run for a new part of coaching, write me.
Sometimes I realize I'm running on empty. Oh, I'm sleeping plenty, and I remember to eat more than I used to, and my life is going great, but my soul is hungry. I've been putting others and other things before me, before my dreams, before my being. And try as I might, I just can't care and love and give the way I like to unless my heart and soul and being are full, overflowing, drenched in inspiration. I don't think or know if it's this way for everyone, but I am an artist, for better or worse, and it is this way for me.
I'll notice it in little signs. The way I stretch my feet while on the subway, subconsciously sliding one foot out of my sandal, letting it gently press through a flexed position and slide into pointed. And repeat. My hands start to itch to paint. My thoughts play through my mind like a really great book, or narration of a film. And a dull, low ache, begins to wrap itself around my core. Sing. Dance. Move. Run. Play. Color. Try. Make. Trust. Write. Stretch. This little soundtrack composed by my inner most needs.
So I start to fill up. I watch things like this, and I think about the last time my bare feet touched the floor of a studio. And I marvel in the gifts that others have, and the wonders of what our bodies can do, and the ability to tell a story without speaking:
And I re-watch things like this, and I remember what it feels like to be so fully committed, and on fire with passion, and fearless and terrified all at the same time:
And I re-watch a season of this, to remember why I'm an actor, because ohmygod have you seen the genius that are these actors? The way their ability to do nothing is just everything? The way I become fixated that I must be on this show, I must be on this show. Or at least on the set, just watching, absorbing:
And I turn to words and poems and stories that crawl into the space of my soul that needs it the most:
And I think about how in the past, those words above would have surely sent me into a memory about broken hearts from boys, but seeing those words now, as I am in this very moment, I am aware of how very much it has nothing to do with boys. Quite frankly my heart is very happy in that area, thankyouverymuch. And this delights me. So instead of seeing that, this quote took the shape of me doing, trying, and going toward anything except what I want. For all the human reasons that we humans do that sort of thing. And in a way, that's almost worse than the kind of pain from a broken heart from other people. Breaking your own heart is worse. Except I think something is cracking, and it's either my sanity or my heart. And I think maybe instead of breaking, it's opening. Letting the light back in, or the fire back out, or both at once. And I wonder if I'll let it open all the way, or if I'll get to try again another time. Because eventually it will open to my truth.
I stumbled onto some work by Ashok Sinha the other day and holymy am I obsessed. Go check out some more of her stuff here and tell me if you fall in love with them, too.
For the record, that's LA up top, and NYC underneath. My favorite places, natch.
I have been coveting this desk from Crate & Barrel for a long time now. Well, to be fair, the bookshelves first. But then.. the desk. The gorgeous, leaning, sleek, fancypants desk that I would surely not be able to afford.
And so I turned to where I always turn when in need of a piece of furniture: Craigslist. Natch. And there, that very day I thought to myself, 'well let's just have a looksie' .. there it was. And just a mere neighborhood away! No price listed. And posted three days prior to my finding this listing. Troublesome signs, but an email was sent anyway. And lo & behold, the next morning a response that the ONLY item he had left from his listing was this very desk, and if I wanted to come grab it, he'd give it to me for free.
Shabam, boom, bang. Dream desk: acquired. And already a total mess :)
Hello lovelies! I wanted to make myself a little printable but halfway through, I realized it was for you, too. I'm so inspired by text, fonts, words, sayings, quotes, the way words are strung together in specific combinations and how just one word being different can change everything. Mm, delicious! Words are a huge reason I'm an actor. I love telling stories.
I don't exactly have any idea what I'm doing when it comes to making things like this.. but I don't particularly see that as a reason to not try. This seems to be my modus operandi lately: think of something I want to do, teach myself how to do it, check it off the list, next item. I'm fascinated by design and fancy this my next thing to tackle. So here we are, the result of finding a quote I liked, seeing it in my mind as a print, and then creating it. Bam! So tell me: what can you try today that you want to do, but don't "know how to do"? Leave it in the comments, please&thankyou.
Email me if you want me to send you this image! xo EDIT: My perfectionist mother has informed me that in my excitement over creating this, I added in an incorrect apostrophe in my first version. The grammatically correct print is now up :)
when i was 17, i got this great idea to paint my bedroom pink. it was light blue-ish at the time and i thought no. no more of this. it's time for pink! so i went to the local home depot and picked out a disney paint color called 'princess pink' (could not make that up if i tried) and had my three male bff's at the time paint my room whilst i sat on the floor and talked. most people do that at 6, right? demand a pink room? princess pink, none the less. not me, i waited until 17.
so a handful of years (and one very pink college dorm room) later, i outgrew it all at once. all of it, the whole pink kabob. my room was re-painted mint green (i mainly sat and talked through this one, too) and the pink really left my life. when i moved into my latest place, i saw the blank wall in front of me and thought: light pink. a grown up pink! and no one was more shocked than i was.
being back in my room now, post LA, i was unpacking and cleaning up when i noticed something: PINK everywhere. the wall, my flowers next to my bedside table, lady's new travel bag and her favorite toy, her new collar, the jeans that i can't stop wearing, the dress that i longed for while away, and the latest painting i painted. (while i was painting it, i was chatting with a friend who was over, and told her that it needed pink, but i wasn't sure where to add it yet, however the painting would tell me where to put it. just in case you weren't sure if i was totally nuts or not.) just so much pink.
and you know what? i like it a whole lot :)
p.s. i know i included two pictures of the painting bc one has the pink wall in the background and the other has that cutie baby face little girl all snuggled up in the background and i sort of couldn't resist.
p.p.s. my camera and i have been reunited! this means a 50/50 chance of actually getting quality pictures around these parts! holler!
when i'm traveling and looking at places to stay, it's imperative that the design speak to me.
most people go with budget, location, size, etc. for me? all about the energy/look of the space.
the first time i walked through the door, it felt like i lived here. which, when you're traveling, is the absolute best feeling to have. a little home away from home to create, learn, dream & play in :)
in related news: can you handle how much sunshine exists here?!
it felt impossible to get any pictures that weren't full of light. LA, i love your sunlight!
i can't wait to have my real camera back in my life, in the meantime, iphone it is!
